


No Good Deed Goes Unpunished

by miss_whimsy



Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-10-31
Updated: 2013-10-31
Packaged: 2017-12-31 02:21:40
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 575
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1026147
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/miss_whimsy/pseuds/miss_whimsy
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>This was supposed to be the first of Five Times Phil Wrote His Resignation... but it never got finished. Have it as a stand alone piece of silliness.</p>
            </blockquote>





	No Good Deed Goes Unpunished

Phil closed his eyes and took a deep breath in the aftermath of the fight, pushing himself to his feet to check on everyone as the dust settled around them. 

"Is everyone okay?" Rogers' voice crackled in his ear.

"Report," he croaked out and proceeded to cough up what felt like his whole lung. 

He felt a tug on his sleeve and he composed himself enough to smile blandly at the woman he'd pushed to safety. "Are you hurt, ma'am?"

The woman, who had to be eighty, and who reminded Phil oddly of his grandmother, drew herself up to her full height and poked Phil in the chest. "Young man, you ought to be ashamed of yourself. Throwing me across the street like that." 

Phil restrained himself from pointing at the pile of masonry which had formerly been a wall, that now covered exactly the spot where she'd been standing. "I apologize if you've sustained an injury. We can get you to a hospital." 

"I'd like to speak to your supervisor," she said with a sniff, brushing some dust from the arm of her coat. "I'm sure you have one."

"Agent Coulson?" Steve's voice crackled again. "Are you there, sir?"

"I can take her out if she's a threat, Sir. I have a clear shot," Barton's more amused tone drifted to him.

Phil pulled out his earpiece and led the woman over to his car. "If you'd like to make a complaint, ma'am, I have a card with a number you can call." He kept his smile courteous and polite."

"I want to speak to someone in person," she said, and Phil had a brief flash of introducing her to Director Fury and letting things run their course.

"Is there a problem here?" Steve jogged up to them, making both Phil and the woman look up.

"No problem, Captain," Phil said. "This lady just wanted to make a complaint about my over-zealous behavior."

"Oh my," the woman said, clasping one hand to her chest and reaching the other out towards Steve tentatively. "Captain America."

Steve took her hand between both of his and gave her his best "who me? aw shucks" expression. Phil managed not to roll his eyes. Or sigh in the same dreamy manner as the woman standing between them.

"I'm sure Agent Coulson saved your life, ma'am," Steve said, firm and sure. "He's saved mine a couple of times." 

Phil was really glad he couldn't hear Barton right then. Or Stark. He slid on his sunglasses.

"Well, I, I…" the woman stuttered and Steve nodded, patting her hand in an understanding way. 

"Shock makes everyone react differently. Would you like some tea?"

Phil watched as Captain America led the woman away, all thoughts of filing a complaint magically disappearing in the face of Steve Rogers' smile.

"I quit," Phil sighed, turning back to his car. He climbed into the passenger seat and pulled a form out of the folder on the dash. "I'm going to finish up here, and then I quit."

"Talking to yourself is the first sign of madness, Sir." Barton's voice again, but this time from the roof of his car. "And you can't quit you know. Who'd stand around mooning over Cap if you weren't here?"

Phil glanced towards Steve, who was leading the woman into the obligatory Starbucks on the corner. Tony landed next to him, faceplate raised and beaming.

"I think he'd be fine," Phil said.


End file.
